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Wednesday, January 21, 2015

Not Just A Creepy Cartoon, It's Artificial Imbecillence!

Horrifying Kickstarter Staff Pick. The mad monotonous piano scales in the background of the pitch perfectly capture the derangement produced by incessant insipid vapid algorithmic chatter. Extra points are due to the marketing jiujitsu of turning "hands-off" help into a feature. Of course it's "hands off": It's a goddamn lobotomized Disney Princess cartoon interrupting you with autocorrect suggestions wherever you go.

2 comments:

Esebian said...

Oh boy, thing looks like something out of Black Mirror. Reminds me of the earliest build of IKEA's automated online assistant, Anna. Same mustard-yellow shirt and Barbie look.

Bonus points for the creepy techbro undertones. "She's the whole package, fellas! A pretty robot, eh?"

Since you can become a "Personal Robot Lover" (for only $4.00!) I believe it's plain they set out to create more of a sexbot than just a chatbot-installed-on-a-smartphone-mounted-on-a-Segway gizmo.

Also of note, Mr. Head Honcho "grew up on [his] dad's factory floor." So in other words, you got all your important chief executive offices through your daddy's connections, yes?

SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY

Dale Carrico said...

Jerking off to porn means you have a "personal robot lover." Now that's some creative re-branding, there, techbros. I like how the ad copy emphasizes your personal robot lover can become a stereo speaker after you break up with it. Techbros living the dream... to the extreme!